Dating Your Spouse

Ahhhhh dating. Dating is the best if you ask me. The butterflies, the romantic gestures, the sparks flying, all of it. Who says that has to stop once you’re married ? Dating your boyfriend is fun, but dating g your husband is MAGICAL. 💫

Everyone who is married knows that life gets in the way of things. When you were dating and had less responsibilities it was easier to find time to go out on the town and spend hours talking and flirting. It is so important to continue that effort once you’re married. Mine and my husbands dates look a lot different now that we are parents, dog owners, and home owner. Our alone time is slim to none but we DO make the effort to have alone time to keep the spark alive. After all, there’s something so spicy about being able to flirt with your husband. Call me crazy but marriage is incredible and there’s something so satisfying about knowing you locked a man down for life and no woman can take him. Okay, before I show you my crazy side let’s talk about date nights. Date nights will look different for all of us since we all lead different lives. So i want to talk about the dates my husband and I did before we had our son. Let’s go:

Date Ideas for the newly weds:

1. Picnics. As cliche as a picnic is they really are so romantic. And I don’t know about you but I would rather live on a million snacks than 3 main meals a day so a picnic is right up my alley. Grab a huge blanket, pick a cute spot, and pack all your favorite snacks. By eliminating distractions it allows you to fully be present with your spouse.

2. The romantic dinner. I know fancy dinners and getting dressed up aren’t always the case but I can’t deny that it is fun sometimes to get dolled up and go out with your husband. Expensive isn’t synonymous with exceptional. You can go to your favorite, causal restaurant and still dress up simply because you can. It’s always a good time.

3. Something spontaneous. I remember one of the last dates my husband and I had before the arrival of our son was a spontaneous trip to Santa Monica. Now that we’re parents it takes us a good 2 weeks to plan any sort of trip so you better believe spontaneity is off the table. Pick a fun place to go whether it me an art class, mini golf, or heck, maybe even a small road trip. Any place is an adventure as long as you’re together.

Now for the married couples with kids. This is tricky but roll with me here and take these suggestions with a grain of salt. I know it’s tough to find the time but it’s important to try.

1. A nap. Have you even given your baby to grandma for the day and simply lounged with your husband? No ? Do it. One of the best dates for the exhausted parents is rest. And there is something so intimate and sweet about lounging with your husband in sweet silence with your legs intertwined with one another. You don’t even have to talk. You can sit there in comfortable silence while you read a book, watch a movie, or hey even kiss a little without being interrupted. Making out is still a thing for married folks y’all.

2. In-n-out. My husband and I are notorious for finally getting alone time and then hitting the drive thru and eating it in our car while we listen to music or talk about our day. It’s cheap, you can stay in your comfy clothes, and animal fries are involved. It’s a win-win for everybody.

3. Romantic night in. Sometimes (when I have the energy) i like to surprise my husband with a baby free house, dinner, and romantic music. Ask your parents or sitter to watch the baby for a couple hours so that you two can eat dinner together without little hands constantly grabbing you. Our society preaches how men should spoil their woman and yes to an extent that is true. But also we should spoil our man. My husband makes it so easy to spoil him because, not to sound bias, but he’s the best man in the entire world. Ok moving on. Surprise your man with a romantic at home dinner. Order in, cook, or even cook together. Whatever you two might like most, do that. Get cleaned up a bit and put a little lip gloss on and let the flirting begin. My husband and I still flirt to this day. It’s way more nerdy and funny rather than sexy and romantic, but it still gives me butterflies.

The most important thing to remember when dating your spouse is that you are in this life together. When you nurture your marriage, you will reap happiness. Make it a priority to once a month have at least 2-4 hours of alone time. I know not everyone can do it as often but it is so important to put in the time and effort in your marriage. Your life and your children’s life with benefit from it. One of the best pieces of advice I ever got was from my mother - in - love and she told me that when my husband and I go on a date to not talk about our baby. At first I was like, “Excuse me that’s rude.” 😂 Then after going on a date and only talking about our son I realized i wasn’t prioritizing my marriage. So turns out she was right and now we keep the baby talk to a minimum. We talk about our dreams, our mental health, our concerns, and all in all just our life. We re-connect with each other.

I hope some of these were helpful and remember that no matter what your date night looks like, as long as it’s YOURS it’s priceless. ♥️

Hannah Grenz